Monday, May 11, 2009

My Miami Experience In a Nutshell: Some Lists for Your Enjoyment (Viewing and Otherwise)


Sorry it took me a while to update. Been busy with vacay (sigh, it is a burden that I must take upon myself). Anyhoo, to keep you up to speed on my Miami funcation, here are some things that have made an impression on me about this unique - in both good and extremely odd ways - city.

Things I Like About Miami
1. Endless sunshine, consistent warm weather and no bizarre changes like we have in NYC (where the temp drops 40 degrees in 20 minutes)

2. The beach - sand, color of water, soothing ocean sounds

3. The boardwalk - an amazing place to jog, dodge vacationing lovers, and peek into the courtyards of hotels and other condo buildings

4. The amazing, newly renovated Fountainbleau pool, which I successfully snuck into. I love its myriad options for lounging, the all-white theme, and especially, the kiddie water slide

5. Yummy new kosher restaurants to discover - I keep hearing about The Gourmet Carrot and of course, Grill Time

6. The different lifestyle - there is more of a Latino emphasis; people seem to be less obsessed with money, work, power and more about enjoying life

7. The art deco, pastel buildings and theme
8. Just being on vacay and doing whatever the heck I want, when I want. Essentially - not being anyone's beer wench. This would hold true in any city, but feels particularly real in Miami, for some reason.

Things I Dislike About Miami
1. Portly men in speedos

2. Abundance of portly women in different versions of be-spandexed ensembles. The most glaring violation of fashion protocol was the 'lady' in a yellow spandex 'dress' (if it can be called that) with a tattoo behind each thigh that together, read 'badass mama' or something equally horrifying

3. Abundance of hideous tattoos in addition to badass mamacita one, missing teeth (I am not a snob - this is just jarring to me). Am I hanging out in the wrong circles?

4. The pathetic bus payment system, which has not yet gone over to Metrocard-type payment and requires cash (singles) each time. Also, the bus drivers appear to be deaf/mute since they never appear to hear (my admittedly) touristy questions and when pressed, finally mumble something out of the corner of their mouths

5. The insane heat that has put myself and my travel companion in a consistent fugue since we got here (but I'm not complaining!)

Things I Find Odd/Endearing About Miami
1. Old school Miami kitsch - flamingos, tropical shirts, Sea World-type souveneirs

2. Early bird specials

3. Interesting (not gross as above) fashion choices - colorful muumuus, sky-high clogs, unusually orangey lipstick and nail polish colors

4. The frummies in my building who seem unsure whether I am relig or not
5. The fact that when I see coconuts, rather than reminding me of pina coladas, they instead bring to mind that Keith Richards (the Rolling Stones kook, if you amazingly did not know who that is) fell out of a palm tree and injured himself whilst trying to pick one
I am sure there is much more but I'll have to ruminate on it and get back to you when I return. Don't miss me too much!

Your Florida Baby

No comments: